have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
If I had your ass I would rule the world
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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