Sry I called you an 8
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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