we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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