I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
