At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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