I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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