do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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