You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
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