i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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