best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I deserve this hangover.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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