Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
