we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
