Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
