this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
