have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize