Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I lost the right to judge tonight
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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