I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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