After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
love makes seman taste better
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
