he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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