Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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