I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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