Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
