people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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