i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Randomize
