You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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