I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Someone shattered a urinal.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
