This is the prime rib incident all over again
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
soo... how was my night?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
