I wannas sexs uuuuu
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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