dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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