He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
