1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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