i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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