The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize