I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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