roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize