okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
you had me at cake vodka
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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