actually, I'm a sock model
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Randomize
