Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
