do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
is that a dick in a sweater?
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