no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
