Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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