You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
