definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
