Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
