i think my tv is drunk
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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