Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
