Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
