The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
