I just made out with a guy for $7.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Boobs speak an international language.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
