im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Everyone says I win the strip club
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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