My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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